Today and every day, but especially right now, I am so aware of the fleeting baby hood before me.
Nolan is 7 months old and I am seeing him turn into a little boy. Today he swung in a swing for the first time. Held on to the chains while I pushed him, it was like he knew where to put his hands. While he was swinging, I noticed the remnants of lunch on his cheek, yellow squash and orangey mango puree. I saw him sucking in his lips and kicking his legs with glee and self determination. I saw his uncut toe nails peeking up at me, reminding me that now it takes a song and dance and two people to cut his nails. I think about how he rolls away from me when we are napping, as if to say, “I’ve got this sleeping thing down.” Or how he chooses sometimes not to nurse, turning his head to more important things in his world. Today I caught myself saying out loud, “Do you need me now?” after some independent play time in the jumperoo, and thinking, there will be a day really soon, when he says, “No.” For now the answer is yes, and, now please. He gives me flirty looks that will always get me to say yes, pick him up, kiss his nose, tickle his tummy, and smile back at those blue eyes and gummy grin.